In the Wait

God's plan is the best, sometimes it is just hard to see

No words

Lately, I’ve felt as if I’ve had no words to share with mommas who are struggling. I’ve tried over and over to put my thoughts on paper, but they always seem a jumbled mess. So please excuse me if they aren’t as eloquent as I’d hoped. But know these words are real. They are hard to muster. And they consume feelings I never knew were possible.

I have no words for how thankful I am for our journey to get to Elle Kathryn. And as I always say, I would do it 100xs over again if I knew it would always lead me to her. But how do you explain this to people who are still waiting? It’s hard for me. It’s hard because while going through the motions of starting a family… I never once thought about this part. I prayed that we would one day be able to spread hope and God’s love, but I didn’t think about how tough conversations would be because your heart is hurting so bad for the ones who aren’t physically holding their every last dream. I’m sometimes scared they look at me and think I’ve forgotten their pain, but I haven’t. Sometimes I just feel like I have no words that can comfort them because I’m no longer standing in their shoes. And in all honesty, I’ve never prayed harder for mommas in the Wait.

I have no words because life after infertility is hard. Please, I’m not asking for any pitty. You just don’t know what side of the fence is yours anymore. Or at least that’s my struggle.

For the last six months it’s been hard to find words for all the sweet mommas still waiting. Being on the other side of infertility is strange in some sort. You pray that the pictures you post and the words you say bring hope, but you know behind their smiles some mommas in the Wait are really hurting. I know they are. I’ve been there. I do know that you can be both happy and sad at the same time. I learned that while in the Wait. Being genuinely happy for someone but having your heart hurt at the same time does happen. And I don’t ever want to cause hurt, I don’t ever want to feel like I am now unintentionally causing pain to others. That alone brings up the emotions of feeling both happy and sad all over again. Happy to be holding my sweet little girl and heart broken for mommas who aren’t quite there yet. It’s all so strange.

Now not only am I on the other side of a short three year battle that at the time felt like a life time, I’m pregnant. Again. Naturally. One hundred percent God’s plan. And when we found out, I had no words. I couldn’t regulate my emotions and sometimes I still can’t. I couldn’t get past the struggle it took to get Elle Kathryn here, the fact that she is still my baby, and how I am going to use my story for the good without causing pain. Sometimes I just have no words. I don’t know what to say. How did this even happen?

This pregnancy will one day get its own post, but for now we are thankful that God is trusting us with another little girl. Hollis, we cannot wait to love you forever too. And just as Elle Kathryn, we pray you bring hope.

This journey has led me to having no words for the amount of love I feel for Elle Kathryn. My sister in law often asks, “Do you just love her so much?” And I catch myself freezing up because I can’t fully explain my love in a few short words. I knew I would love her, but I didn’t know it would be like this. I didn’t know she would consume my every single breath. I didn’t know this tiny human that God trusted me with literally holds my heart in her hand. I thank God every day for her. She has taught me I can go with the first outfit I try on because the other twenty don’t fit anymore or time is of the essence and I’ve run out of it when it comes to me. She’s taught me to be independent and be strong because I physically have a little one who needs me. She’s made me selfish with my time, devoting it all to her and having zero FOMO because I’m realizing too quickly that time passes so quickly. And the love I have for her leaves me with no words to mommas who want their own. It’s the strangest feeling.

I just need people to believe me when I say God is good. He knows your desires, but sometimes his plan is a little different. He knows your pain, and holds your hand tightly as you weep. He knows your heart, and he wants just as badly for you to share it with one of his children. Mommas in the Wait, I’ve come to the conclusion that the loss of words that I battle with daily is a result for how badly I want this for you. It’s not because I’ve moved on. It’s not because I’m too busy. But it’s because I know the feeling now, and I pray every day you get to experience it soon.

God knew this would be my story, and I pray I will continue to use it to share His goodness.

Waiting on the right words to say,


To the Selfless Soul Keeping My Baby

To the selfless soul keeping my baby,

I’m struggling. My heart is already missing her and I haven’t even left for work yet. One million things are going through my head, but I keep telling myself “be brave Katie, mommas do this all the time”. You see, I’ve been brave since God placed being a momma on my heart. And out of all the hard things I had to do to get her here, this is by far the hardest. This time has gone by so quickly, and right now I’m honestly praying it freezes.

But I’ll be loading her up with all her little pink things in her little pink monogram bag, that little bag I always prayed I’d carry. I’ll gather all the trinkets that I think might sooth her when she’s sad, her bottles with her cute little name stickers that I spent hours picking out, and literally all the love I have in my heart. And I’ll bring her to you, because that’s what this momma has to do.

So when you see me, I might be able to give you a half smile without bursting into tears. I might be able to hug your neck so tight, but leave tear stains on your collar. And I might be able to hand you over my little girl, but stand and watch you hold her for a moment and wish so badly I could trade places with you. And as you know so well, you’re holding my every breath in your hands. Those hands of yours, we’ve prayed for every night. We’ve prayed they are hands that love, sooth, and serve as a safe place for our little one. We pray you two create a bond that only you two can have. We also thank the Lord for you every night too. We thank him that his plan led us to you. We thank Him that you choose to show His grace every day when taking care of littles. We thank Him for the bond and love we as her parents already feel with you.

I do want you to know that I’m not worried about her being with you. Although, I’m so terribly sad it’s not me, I really am so glad it’s you. I know you will experience milestones with her that I may not. I know you might witness some of her firsts that I may not. And with tears falling as I write, that’s my only worry. I know you can’t appreciate them the exact way a momma would, but I do pray you appreciate them in a special way. And my heart has a feeling that it’s going to be the sweetest way.

I know throughout this first year, I’ll ask for many favors. And I apologize in advance if you have to send multiple reminders of things she needs or changes being made because my little ADD brain tends to get overwhelmed and forgetful quite easily. But please, one favor from me early on… maybe you could whisper a few “momma loves you’s” throughout the day? Because that little girl I just handed to you has my whole heart, every last beat.

And you sweet Trae, you have my heart now too. We trust you. We love you. And we are so thankful that she gets to be loved by you.

So before I walk out the door, get in my car, and drive away I want to tell you just a few things…I want you to know Elle loves when we sing. I sing to her all day, during the happy times and sad times. Sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn’t. When she naps, she loves to burry her little face in your arms, that’s where she feels most safe. You may think it’s hard for her to breathe, but she finds a way. And a little heads up, she puts up a mean fight to finally fall asleep. I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you that I’ve cried along with her before. And eye contact, it makes her smile. When you witness her first smile, the one that takes up her whole face, I hope you can see why leaving her hurts every fiber in my body. But I also know that smile needs to be shared, because I fully believe her purpose here on earth is to give hope.

We hoped for her. We hoped for her for a long time, the way we hope every momma and daddy in the Wait get to experience this kind of love one day. But we also hoped for you too. We hoped we would find someone to love her like their own. We hoped we would find someone who prays and hugs. And we hoped that our hearts would feel full knowing she is loved and taken care of when we can’t physically be there. Our hope came true in you, we love you.

Waiting on 4 o’clock,


You’re Here

Sweet Elle,

You’re here. You made it. You’ve actually been here for a little bit. And to be honest, I’ve been writing this for a long time. It’s just taken your momma a little longer for her heart to form words. Not for any reason in particular, just simply because for nine months I didn’t have to share you with anyone and now I do. Sure, we’ve shared your story for years, but now it’s real. It’s only been little over a month, but I don’t even know what we did before you…except dream about you. Your daddy and I are so thankful we don’t have to spend another month without you.

Not to anyone’s surprise you made it here, and only with a few little hiccups along the way. I want to share your birth story with you. Not that I’ll ever forget that day, but there will come a day when I don’t get to hold your little seven pound self and feel all the feels that I felt that day. For the last month I’ve tried to soak up every snuggle with you because far too many people have told me that babies don’t keep. So I want you to know that your birth will forever be my greatest accomplishment and my most favorite memory that will always keep.

Sweet girl, momma carried you for a long thirty-eight weeks. And during that time, it was just me and you. Just like any expecting mom, there were good days and there were hard days. But after being monitored closely by the best doctor and nurses, we decided to induce to get you here as soon as possible. My body did not respond as we hoped (go figure) and we opted for a c-section. The c-section to get you here was so perfect. Your daddy and I were so excited and so nervous. Inside the operating room they were playing our song for you, singing you happy birthday, and taking the best care of me. Before we knew it, you were here… crying the sweetest cry and looking just like me.

Momma and daddy got to love on you together. We got to look at your little face with all your sweet little features. We counted your fingers and your toes and were in awe of those two little dimples. We got to hold you close and not share you with anyone for the sweetest hour. I remember not being able to fully grasp that this was real life. You were here.

This is when I saw your daddy turn into a daddy. And this is the moment I knew my heart was finally complete. Your daddy has been his best self since he saw you. Forever ingrained in my heart is what he looked like seeing you for the first time. He has loved you in a way that brings me to tears. A way that I always want you to be loved.

Shortly after you were here, mommy didn’t feel too well. But don’t worry, there was an army of nurses and doctors by my side while you were being snuggled by so many friends and family, friends and family who prayed and prayed for your arrival. The same prayers that got you here, helped mommy feel better too.

I hope you always believe in the power of prayer. I hope you always know God performs miracles, big and small. And that God has angels here on Earth. I know, because they surrounded your momma all day and night. After feeling a great deal of pain, and the pain medicines not working like we hoped my doctor knew we had to do something else.

To most, this lady right here is their doctor but to me she’s my hero… although her humble heart will never admit it. God put her in the right place at the RIGHT time. Within moments of being in my room, my blood pressure plummeted. After getting me to come to, she called a RAPID throughout the hospital and assembled a team of doctors and nurses to take the best care of me. And they did just that. She knew things weren’t making sense and we went back in for an emergency surgery where they found momma had been bleeding. Nothing related to my previous surgery and or any previous IVF treatments. It was just my body’s reaction and God’s plan. Again, He was reminding me that He’s always with me.

Why me I thought shortly after? But now, I think why not me? God had been preparing our strength and our story for this very moment and now every time I look at you I know I wouldn’t change a thing. Yet again, we had to have faith in our Heavenly Father. And sissy, we have a lot of faith… that’s ultimately what got you here in the first place. I’m so thankful He is our ultimate healer and works through the hands of doctors like ours. Your momma’s doctor saved her life, so I could spend the rest of it with you. And since your delivery we add in an extra prayer, “God is good, God is great. Thank you for Dr. Martin. Amen. ”

To top off our week’s long stay, momma got pneumonia and your bilirubin numbers spiked which caused us to stay just a little longer. In the scheme of things, these little hurdles were nothing compared to what other Mommas and babies are facing around the world. So each night we said extra prayers for those facing harder times than us. The extra time in the hospital allowed us to learn a little more about taking care of a newborn, but it mostly taught us about the selfless love and dedication each doctor and nurse poured into us on an hourly basis. And for them, we will forever be thankful.

A month later and I’m still crying the sweetest of tears. But not strictly because I’m a hormonal mess, exhausted, or a new mom, but because when I look at you I get a rush of emotions. You are no longer a figment of my imagination, a distant dream, or a constant prayer… you are here.

I’ve waited a long time to love you like I do,


I think it’s safe to say that you’ll be your daddy’s girl, living in your momma’s world.

You’re almost Here

Elle Kathryn,

It is officially your month. You’re almost here little girl. You will be making your arrival so soon and it’s so surreal. To be honest, there was a time when your dad and I felt like we’d already been pregnant for years. Just because our journey to you was a little longer than expected. But honestly, there isn’t a day that I think about the length of our journey anymore. I’ve heard Mommas say over and over “in His time” or “His timing is perfect” and almost being on the other side… I get it.

For the last almost 9 months, we’ve been living a dream. A dream that so many want. And why it was finally our turn, I’ll never know. But what I do know is your purpose here. Your purpose gives me hope. And I pray every time someone sees you or hears your story, you give them hope too. You see, I needed to read stories and see other promised babies to get you here too. I am so thankful for families who shared their journeys. God is so good.

As we get closer to you, I am a hot mess. Thinking about you makes me cry the sweetest tears. Will you look like your daddy? Will you be scatterbrained like your momma? Will you love like Jesus? All I know is, I can’t wait to meet you and will love every ounce of you.

We’re set to meet you in about 25 days, but if you want to come a little sooner I won’t complain. Although I’ve loved growing you in my belly… pregnancy isn’t for the weak. Being pregnant has made me want to hug every momma’s neck a little harder. I’ll miss your little moves and kicks, but I won’t miss the swell. Haha. What I do know, is that I would do this over and over again for you.

We’re all packed. We are just waiting on you. I can’t promise to be the perfect momma, but I can promise to be the best momma for you.

Waiting on your arrival,


Momma, this one’s for you


This one’s for you. It’s for the pain you felt for so long and also for the joy you’ve felt now for so long too. It’s for you and for any other momma who has had to brave Mother’s Day with a broken heart. It’s a strength you had to find from deep in your heart, but I’m so thankful you continued to be faithful in your Wait.

All day today, I couldn’t help but think about the thirteen years you waited to celebrate today. I couldn’t help but think about the hurt you felt not getting a flower on Mother’s Day at church. And I couldn’t help but think about all the prayers you must have prayed. I honestly don’t know how you did it. But what I do know, is that it made you the best mom for Jeni and me.

And although I hate to say it, I’m so thankful for those thirteen years, or else I wouldn’t be here. Some other lucky little one would be living this simple yet perfect life you’ve given me. All those years of hurting on Mother’s Day made you the absolute best. All those years of hurting allowed you to love us in a way you might not have loved us before. I also believe your wait was preparing your heart to help me with mine. And I thank God every day for that.

Momma, I pray your story gives hope to so many. I pray that all Mommas in the wait look at your journey and turn to God and his plan. I pray they see your beauty, inside and out and believe in miracles. Because of you and your faith, all my dreams of becoming a momma like you… are now coming true.

I hope Elle see’s you in me. I hope she knows how loved she is because you never fail to tell me. I hope she’s strong, brave, and courageous… because I’ll tell her that all comes from you. And I hope she loves Jesus, because that’s what you taught me to do.

I didn’t have to wait near as long as you, mom. I didn’t have to skip as many Mother’s Day church services and or crowds either. But I did experience a smidge of the pain this day can bring to one that’s yearning for their own. Today was bitter sweet. Today I woke up with a joy in my heart, but such a pain for others. So I’m choosing to celebrate every type of momma: the ones who have, the ones who have lost, and the ones who still wait… because that’s what you taught me to do too.

Happy Mother’s Day, momma. I am who I am because of you.

Thank you for waiting on us,


I’m Going to Miss Him

I’m going to miss him. But yet, I’m so excited to see the new him. A him that I’ve been waiting to see for years now. I guess I shouldn’t say the “new him” because all of my favorite qualities about him will continue to be the same, but then grow in a way I can’t even imagine yet. Of all people, he knows change scares me. Being a mom does not, and seeing him as a dad certainly doesn’t. But losing us, makes me a little nervous. He’s my most favorite person and I feel my safest when I’m with him.

For years, it’s just been me and him… well, of course our two fur pups too. We’ve done so much together. And over the last almost seven years of our relationship, I’ve loved every minute. Don’t worry, I’m not forgetting the difficult days. The days when it was hard for him to like me, but he continued to love me. The days when I let my emotions and fear drive me to a whole new me, but he stood beside me anyway. And the days I spent in tears and fears that where we are now felt like so far away. I know he will only continue to love me and our little girl the same over the next chapter of our lives too.

I’m going to miss the spur of the moment trips we make and countless date nights to our favorite places. But I hope our relationship has prepared both of our hearts for what’s to come. And although our hearts hurt for years, I wouldn’t trade them for anything and today I’m thankful for them. I’m thankful for the foundation it set for our family, and I’m thankful they allowed me to have him all to myself for so long.

Dating my husband and being his wife has been my greatest joy, and some parts of me are sad to share him. Honestly, I feel so guilty actually saying that out loud. I feel so guilty because this is something that we both have wanted, prayed for, and fought for… but I never knew these emotions would ever arise. So I’m vowing to myself to soak up every minute with him until our sweet little girl gets here. Because that is when I’ll get to meet the “new him”, that might just be the “best him”.

What I do know, is that I’m going to love him in a whole new way. A way that I’ve prayed for for what seems like forever. A way that I see all my friends love their husbands. I also know that Elle is going to be so lucky, and I wouldn’t want to share her with anyone else but him. She already has a daddy that does so much for her and loves her so big. And honestly, I love seeing his heart grow. So maybe sharing him won’t be so bad after all…

I’m so thankful to have a husband I’m not quite ready to share, but even more thankful to be sharing him with our greatest joy.

Selfishly waiting for a few more months,


Your First Letter

Sweet Elle Kathryn,

Never in a million years did I think I was going to get to be your mommy. Don’t get me wrong, I always believed I’d be here one day, writing to my child… but I honestly never thought it would be you.

You see, your momma tried to be a planner. For about two years she tried to run the show. But clearly that show never aired and it never brought me to you. During that time, I prayed. And I prayed hard. But I still tried to control God’s ultimate plan to the best of my ability without really even realizing it. But for the last year of our three year journey, this journey that is bringing us to you, I resigned. I finally realized that our God is a much better planner than me. With the help of so many family, friends, and prayer warriors, we chose to put Faith in this Wait of ours… and goodness, what a story you are to us.

To be frank, I thought you were a boy. Matter of fact, I “knew” you were a boy. I even told your precious doctor and nurses that I was 150% sure I would be a boy mom. I had bought boy clothes, picked out a nursery, referred to you as “he”, and everything in between. Clearly I was “planning” for a bit. But there was really no rhyme or reason to my belief other than a WHOLE LOT of science, or so I thought. And there’s no telling how many times God got a good kick over my foolishness. And yet again, God showed me who’s in control with making you my best surprise ever. I hope you always know that his plan is much better than ours. You little girl, you are proof of that.

With all they being said, I never ever wished for a boy or a girl. I wished for a baby. A healthy baby. A baby of my own and a baby to prove to this uncooperative body of mine that God is good. But if you want to know the truth, you’ve been in my dreams forever. I’ve known your name for years and years, and when I think about you now I think there is no way I could love you anymore.

(Your Lolli, Mimi, Daddy, and MeMe are so ready for you too💗)

But do let me confess, the idea of having a little girl had always made me nervous since being on this journey. Not because of the frill, drama, or boys, but because I never wanted her to know the pain I (and thousands of other Mommas) have felt. Although it’s a pain I’d never take back now, it was still such a difficult season of life. I didn’t know if I could watch someone that I love so much hurt. But you know what, I think that was God’s plan all along. Today and every day forward He is teaching me my strength, and that no matter what battle we face in your sweet lifetime, momma’s got it. And I have no choice but to be strong and support you. And before I knew you were you, I said a special prayer each night for your little organs. I prayed and still pray that however and whenever…you get to feel a love just like this.

Right now, God’s plan couldn’t seem any better. You’ll have two cousins waiting on you that you will get to explore life with, and so many friends and extended family born close in age that will make this life so much sweeter. God has allowed your momma and daddy’s hearts to know a new strength and love and He’s preparing us to be the best we can be for you. Sister, loving you is going to be my most favorite thing yet.

Waiting on you,


Baby Kirkland

Dear Baby Kirkland

I can’t believe you’re here. I can’t believe you’re mine. Don’t get me wrong, I always knew you’d make your way to me. I’ve had full faith that I would become your momma, but I never expected it to feel like this. This feeling I’m experiencing makes me want to hug every Mommas neck a little harder, and it makes me want to buy from every little baby ad that pops up. I wouldn’t wish this journey on anyone, but I’m so glad it was ours.

You see, you’re daddy and I met you on November 7th. We transferred you and another sweet embryo. When we found out we were pregnant I couldn’t help but to wonder if it was just you in there or if I would be carrying two. I honestly had no clue. I can’t help but to think now that the other little embryo helped you get here. He or she blocked you in so you could get nice and cozy. And when I think about the how that might have happened or the decision we had to make to get you here I get emotional. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think we’d have to make a choice like that, but we did. We prayed really hard and we went with what God put in our hearts, and I’m so glad we did. I know my life with you will consist of many other difficult decisions. I pray that we always follow God’s lead. And I pray you do the same too.

I also want you to know that we waited with so much faith. At first it was a little rocky. My heart just hurt. But there were so many people along the way that inspired us, cheered us on, and helped get you here. Some days were easier than others. But we wouldn’t be here without support. You’re momma needed help. I swallowed my pride, dropped my chin, and asked for prayers. Not just for us, but for all the other Mommas and daddies on our same journey. And look where it led us, it led us right to you. I know for a fact that I will ask for help for the rest of your life when it comes to raising you. And I’m not one bit ashamed. I pray my faith will always shine for you, no matter what curveballs life throws our way. And I pray your faith moves mountains one day too.

I wish I could describe the way I felt when I heard your first little heartbeat. It honestly took my breathe away. It’s a sound I turn to when days are bad or worries appear. With the beating of your heart I see God’s promises. Sharing the news of you was such a joy. But I couldn’t help but to hurt for others. The same hurt I’ve known oh so well. I pray your journey here is not a journey in vain, but a journey that gives hope. I had to read a lot of other momma’s journeys to keep me going, and the strength they had to press on helped me keep going. I pray God uses our story to inspire and not cause pain. And I pray you grow up living out your story and doing the exact same too.

I want you to know we never gave up. And when I say “we” I mean your dad and me, all of our family and friends, our doctors and nurses, and all the prayer warriors who lifted you up each night. We never gave up our faith and hope in God’s promises. There were times when we thought we were so close to you, but God had other plans. I would wait a hundred more moons for you. I would continue to walk this journey for miles and miles, as long as it led me right here to you. You sweet baby, are already so loved and already give hope to so many. You are simply all we’ve ever wanted. I pray we are all you’ll ever want too.

Waiting to hold you,



Today we started everything all over again. And although we are familiar with this journey, I’ve prayed and prayed for it to be different, but somethings will always stay the same… the fear, the nerves, the pain, the tears, the appointments, the side effects, the love, the support, our trust in the Lord, and all the sweet prayers. Regardless if these constant variables are good or bad, they are apart of our journey to parenthood. So I have no choice but to put on my big girl pants (which are now 2 sizes bigger) and deal.

As for the changes I’ve prayed for, I’m sure you can guess them all. Right now, I’m narrowing it down to one. One big umbrella prayer, is that cheating??? Surely not, but I pray that this October brings the greatest change yet. That it becomes a month of my body responding the best it can, the strongest embryos to date, and the last October we “physically” spend in the infertility world. I’m well aware that these changes are out of our control no matter what type of weird fruits I eat, vitamins I take, and or how much pink or blue I wear… but it’s all in God’s control and for that we are thankful.

With that being said, we honestly tried to start this round a little differently. We tried to make a few changes on our own, you know just some manual changes that don’t overstep God’s hand in this journey… So, we parked on the opposite side of the parking lot than usual. We usually sit by the window, but today we found a new seat close to the front. I “emptied” my bladder in the furthest bathroom instead of the closest. And I switched seats with Skylar in front of the doctor’s desk. How’s that for some change? See, this is change that we can control. Change that probably will have zero effect on our outcome, but makes this little superstitious soul sleep a little better (I may or may not have inherited that little quirk from my dad). God understands, and I’m sure he thinks I’m funny.

As I sit here, I can’t help but to think about all the other changes that have happened in the last few years. And all those changes have led us right back here {again}. Today, I can’t fully tell you the purpose in those changes, and nor do these changes make sense in my little brain just yet. But one day I will and one day they will. And what a day of rejoicing that will be.

The month of October has been a month of change for us over the last three years. It has been a month that has brought us both excitement and sadness. What we thought would bring us the best and biggest change was in October 16th, 2016, the day we found out we were pregnant. It was the day all felt right in the world. The day I realized what it felt like to love something so much and so new. Something that I’ve never met and or even touched. But something that made me feel whole. A whole that I can’t wait to feel again someday. That month…that day… will ALWAYS be one of my most favorite days. But the heartbreak of that miscarriage really changed my heart. And not for the better. For about eight months after our miscarriage I was in my lowest of lows. My demeanor had changed, my smile had changed, and my heart was slowly becoming so bitter but trying to be strong at the same time. I didn’t like this change. I didn’t like how I had reached my highest of highs, just to feel my worst pain. But I knew I had to keep pushing on if I ever wanted to feel that “whole” feeling again.

With a lot of tears, medicine, and treatment during the following year we decided to make another change. On October 11, 2017 we started our first attempt at IVF. Man, we were SO excited. For as many books and articles as I read, I was still so naive to the fact that there was still a possibility that we wouldn’t result in becoming actual parents. We just knew it was going to be our time though.We just knew we were right where we needed to be. But goodness, that sure changed. Again we felt defeated and heartbroken.

And today, on October 16th, 2018 (same day as our first positive pregnancy test) we started our new round of IVF in high hopes to bring a baby into this world again. Sitting there today, I actually {felt} changed. I felt stronger. I felt seasoned and heard. I felt blessed with the opportunity to do this again. And I felt the power of prayer— and let me tell you, if you’ve never truly experienced the power of prayer, just wait. It’s the coolest feeling. It’s seriously a feeling of peace and clarity walking hand in hand with you as you face moments that once surrounded you with fear and anxiety. Now, this journey is tough so I’m not saying the fear and anxiety of this round won’t creep up now and then… but to start this round without it was the sweetest change.

With all that being said, seasons of change are hard. And I know there are millions of people facing changes much more difficult than ours…So if you know someone going through change, big or small, pray for them. Don’t just tell them you will, actually do it. If you need it, tell me. Because I promise you I will and I have a pretty precious army of pray warriors that will pray for you too. He tells us to come to Him, to lay it all at His feet…. and my gift of gab is good at doing just that.

All of our lab work came back great. All of our medicines are in. And all our trust is in Him. May He show us a change like never before.

Let’s do this round #3!

Waiting for change,


**edited to add** Faith in the Wait shirts are on now on Batch #3! This order will be open for the next 17 days! ALL proceeds go to Lullaby of Hope!

Adults – blue and grey Kids- navy

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